Oh Christmas Tree!

One of my favorite Christmas songs, actually. Oh Christmas Tree. I don’t know all the words to it anymore, so usually I end up singing “oh Christmas tree, oh christmas tree, thou art so fair and lovely! La la la la, la lala la, bum de dum de dum, something something something, oh christmas tree, oh christmas tree….!!” with great enthusiasm and not much talent.

Mike and I put up our Christmas tree today. Well actually last night, but then we ran out of lights because we’d changed our minds as to what kind we wanted on there, and I hadn’t bought enough of the kind we wanted. Or of the kind we initially wanted, either, but that’s kind of a moot point. I LOVE Christmas trees. One of my favorite Christmas traditions. I love tromping through the snow with family, whacking snow off tree branches with sticks, being indecisive, and finally picking one out, cutting it down, and taking it home, and decorating it.

This process is easier and less argument-rich now that I’m an “adult” and I just have one other person with whom to agree on the chosen tree. When I was a kid my two sisters and I had to all agree, and as soon as we’d found one we liked, my parents would come over and my mom would tell us its branches were too spindly, or unevenly spaced, and we would tell her it was just because the snow had been holding them down until we beat them with the stick; my dad would tell us it was too wide for its spot in our house, and we would tell him that was nonsense, that it couldn’t be more than 4 feet wide, and he would put his arms out and say “well I’m 6 foot 1, so that’s how wide my arms are, and let’s see here” (going up closer to the tree, though still staying a good 3 feet away from it, and usually to one side) “yep, this tree is definitely wider than my arms. Why, it’s at least 7 feet wide. No way it’ll fit.” And we’d argue some more, and sometimes we’d win and get to take it home, and once it was inside it was usually both scrawny and too big, just like my parents had said. My sisters and I would refuse to admit this to ourselves or our parents, and my dad would have the satisfaction of saying at least 10 times until the tree came down “geez, this tree is wide! who picked this out??” Once the tree was decorated (always with the same decorations as every year before, with a few new ones we’d made in school - themed trees were something I’d never even heard of) we’d proclaim it the most beautiful ever. We’d entertain ourselves for hours looking at the little wooden ornaments my mom bought in Europe in the 70’s, little people skiing, or sledding, or bringing home a Christmas tree, or ringing a wooden bell, and we’d make up stories and names for them. Each and every ornament had a story and a memory behind it, and we’d tell it again as we carefully unwrapped them from ancient tissue and hung them up with painstaking precision. And occasional arguments about where that one should go. No, over here stupid, you can’t put it next to that one, they’re both the same kind/color/shape/whatever. Duh.

I don’t follow any particular religion, and wasn’t raised to, so for me Christmas is not much about the birth of Christ but about family. About love. About giving, and thoughtfulness, and eating food together, and sitting by the warm fire, and looking at the glittering lights and gleaming ornaments and smelling the crisp needles of the fir tree.

I hear and read things about people complaining about the commercialization of Christmas, and how it’s not all Jesusy like it’s supposed to be, and how it’s lost its true meaning etc. As I’ve grown older and moved past the simple excitement of present anticipation and wishful thinking, I sometimes wonder what Christmas means. I recognize the irony of celebrating a holiday named after someone I don’t necessarily believe in.

But when I put up my Christmas tree with Mike, and reflect back on my childhood memories of this holiday season, I am filled with feelings of warmth, and love, and happiness, shared with those around me. And that, for me, is what Christmas is about. I no longer need to analyze or justify. It is wonderful to buy or make presents for people, wrap them up, and watch them open them and smile with surprise and joy. It’s wonderful to decorate a tree, to go sledding, to eat cookies, to see the town come alive at night with Christmas lights, to say Merry Christmas to everyone. And to open presents, see what’s inside, and realize people were thinking about you when they picked out your gift.

So whatever this time of year means to you, happiness and love be with you.